Who Is Actually Biased Against Women?

By Lateef Adewole

Image: unctad.org

This week's Tuesday, 8th of March, 2022, was another occasion of International Women's Day (IWD). It was exciting watching women celebrate themselves. Many men joined them too. There was massive awareness across the country, with public peaceful protests in Lagos and Abuja in particular. They did so to accentuate their voices in demands for gender friendliness and equality in our polity and national life as a country. The theme for this year's IWD is "Break The Bias".

Let me use this auspicious occasion to celebrate with women worldwide, and especially those in my life. On some occasions, I have been accused of leaning to "feminism" because of what some perceived as my "biases" in favour of women in some of my articles. Well, that's their opinion, to which they are entitled. However, I have every reason to celebrate women. I have a mother, a wife, sisters, friends, family members and colleagues, who are great women, who have impacted my life positively, one way or another. Why won't I glorify them?

Of distinction among this women is my lovely wife, Lateefah, who has been, and remains my rock, on who I rely and can lean. She has made my life liveable by virtue of the family ecosystem she provides for me and our children. I know how critical and important this is because I have seen great men crumbled, just because they lack peace of mind which their wives denied them. As the Yorubas will say; "bi oode o dun, bi igbe n'ilu ri" (when the home is not peaceful, the city becomes irritating). Thank you Temi, my love. I don't take your sacrifices, contributions and supports to me and our family for granted.

If it is about celebrating distinct women, there are too many in history, globally. Zeroing in on Nigeria alone is humongous. From the cultural and historical; Moremi, Oya from the Yoruba mythology. Queen Amina of Zaria and Magajiya Daurama of the famous Hausa history, and many others. The Funmilayo Ransom-Kuti, the Madam Efunroye Tinubu, Mrs. Margaret Ekpo, the famous Aba riot women and so on. The contemporary women of recent years include Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iwealla, Dr. Oby Ezekwezili, late Professor Dora Akunyili, Hajia Amina Muhammed, Mrs. Folorunsho Alakija, Hajia Aisha Yesufu and many others too numerous to mention.

When I saw the theme for this year's IWD as: "Break The Bias", it got me thinking. What exactly is this bias? Who is actually biased against women? According to Oxford dictionary, "Bias (noun) is defined as an inclination or prejudice for or against one person or group, especially in a way considered to be unfair". Synonyms include prejudice, partiality.

It is obvious from this definition, the direction and the intent of such theme chosen this year. This has been a recurring issue globally and particularly in Africa and Nigeria. This is so because, women believe they are marginalised in Nigeria. From home to office. From private sector to public sector. From social to political offices. Whichever area of our national life you look, women feel inadequately represented. Is this really true? Are women justified in their assertions?

Last week, the members of the National Assembly voted on several amendments to the 1999 constitution. Out of about 68 items, 46 passed. 22 rejected. Among those that failed, were some amendments that have to do directly with women. They include: Special Seat for Women in the National and State Houses of Assembly; Expansion of the Scope of Citizenship by Registration; Affirmative Action for Women in Political Party Administration; and Reserved Quota for Women.

Since that day, "igboro ti daru". "Women don vex". From television to radio to public press conferences, women have been tackling the lawmakers and accusing them of chauvinism, and of being "biased" against women. For days, they laid seige at the National Assembly complex, hoping to force the hands of the lawmakers to rescind their decisions. It was while this was going on that the International Women's Day celebration came and "gbam", "ara ran bombu lowo" (the whole thing escalated). The protest and the campaigns became more intense.

As a reward for such efforts, the House of Representatives has decided to revisit their previous positions and possibly rescind their decisions with regards to those rejected amendments concerning women. That was a great news to the women and their attention has shifted to the senate to tow the same line. With the mounted pressure, surely, the senators will have no choice but to buckle.

One big lesson from that is validating the common saying that; "in united we rise, in divided we fall". Women should have realised that if they come together in unity to confront their common challenges, they will definitely achieve much. But are they really, truly ready to unite and support one another for their common and greater goods? Personally, I won't hold my breath!

Let me make something clear, on no account will I ever support any practice, tradition, culture or religion, that oppresses women. I also believe that justice should be done to womenfolks, treat them with equity and fairness. However, I will never subscribe to the "confusions" that many supposed "feminists" bandied as women emancipation. In reality, they are people who either portray women as "weak" or "enslave" them as a consequence of their advices and actions.

Yes, in many parts of Nigeria and Africa, culturally, women might be marginalised. Traditions in some places put women in such situations. However, equating a man with a woman in all aspects as articulated by feminists is completely misunderstood, misinterpreted and misapplied. There is no equality in human existence, but equity can be demanded for. By the way, are all men even equal too? Definitely no! This is how God created humanity.

There are too many things that women are capable of doing that the physically strongest men wouldn't dare. In human anatomy and gynaecology, women perform "miracles", greatest of which is bringing another being to life in child birth. Which man can do that? What women experience and endure as part of their being humans are better imagined by men. Beginning from the periodic menstruation. The kind of pains that some women experience during this period is unimaginable. Then to pregnancy.

Whenever I eat and have constipation just for a short period within a day, with undigested heavy stomach, how inconvenience and restless I always get, I often wondered what women must have then been passing through, carrying a whole human being(s) in their tummies, not for a day, but for approximately 270 days (nine months). The moment of delivery is like going to heaven and coming back, as told to me by my wife. A woman literally "dies and resurrects" while given birth. Can any man undertake all these? Does it make him less of a man?

I understand that in offices, political positions, and the likes, women expect that they should be well represented, particularly quoting the 35% affirmative action. I agree. But, have women really worked towards achieving this? I am not too sure. Historically, women are known to usually not keen to support other women to rise to greater positions, whether domestically, in corporate world or in politics. Let me start from the last point.

There is a classic example I often cited in times like this. It was on 13th of January 2011, as we approached the 2011 general elections. In PDP, there were presidential aspirants which included the then incumbent President Jonathan and Alhaji Atiku Abubakar, both men. The only woman among them was Mrs. Sarah Jubril. When the results of the presidential primary held in Abuja were released, Mrs. Jibril had only one vote. Which means she only voted for herself. This was a primary election that had about 3,603 delegates with nearly half as women. Where were those women? Who did they vote for?

The strongest political office that a woman nearly attained was when the late Hajia Aisha Alhassan, aka "Mama Taraba" (may her soul rest in peace) almost became the governor of Taraba state in 2015. She was declared the winner at the Election Petition Tribunal on 7th of November, 2015 but that verdict was later upturned by the Appellate and Supreme Courts. The highest political positions women have attained through elections are to be deputy governors and lawmakers at states and national assembly as House of Representatives members and senators. And they are still very few.

This is not good for our national development, diversity and inclusiveness, but women would not be given positions "a la carte". They must work for them by supporting one another's aspirations. They can't push to be legislated into political offices simply because they are women. Aren't the same women the people who claim they are equal to men? Why then would they ask that they be "compulsorily" given political slots through the constitution, instead of through competitive processes of elections, against the men they are equal to? That's an exhibition of weakness in my opinion.

History has shown that when women want something and unite to pursue it, they almost always get it. Aba riot of 1929 remained a classic example. What then makes this different? In offices, I agree that some organisations have discriminatory policies which put women at disadvantage when competing for jobs and positions. I believe that is unfair and should not be so. But, the women who made it to the top in this corporate world, became powerful and influential, what efforts have they made to fight such obnoxious policies from inside? What have been their contributions in encouraging and uplifting more women by supporting them to get into the system?

It is no secret that many junior female employees often dread working for or with female bosses. Why? I am not saying all women in authority are bad, as I personally worked with a wonderful woman as my boss, Mrs. Vivian Umar-Suleman (a.k.a Iyalaje). She was distinct, brilliant, exemplary, compassionate, hardworking and kind-hearted. She treated me and my colleagues, who were her subordinates, like her siblings. Yet, in the same organisation, we had "wicked" male bosses! Well, some might say I am a man but I want to believe she would have treated female subordinates in the same manner, as that seemed to be her nature. Thank you for the time we worked together "madam", as we fondly called her!

At family levels, at homes, that is where the greatest, fiercest and most bitter rivalry among women exists and is exhibited. I once read a joke about a woman whose husband used to beat because of her misdemeanours. One day, her husband's friend warned him to stop beating his wife as it's not a good habit, that instead, he should just go and marry a second wife. The friend was shocked when when the woman jumped up and pleaded that her husband should rather continue to beat her instead of marrying another wife. Unbelievable!

Yorubas will say that; "orisa je n pe meji obinrin o de nu" (no woman ever prayed that she shares her husband with another woman). Why is this so? Polygamy is African. Whether we like it or not, we are not "oyinbos" and cannot assume their practice of "coarsed monogamy" is supperior to ours, except for our colonial mentality. However, I am not saying it's a must that men must marry more than one wife. I am only asking why women could not "love other women as themselves", up to helping them out of "spinsterhood and loneliness" by accommodating them in their marriages? (Lol).

Another level of prevalent rivalry is mother-in-law versus daughter-in-law or daughter-in-law versus sister-in-law. All these people are women. There is no greater challenge that a man can face in his marriage than a rancourous relationship among these women. Men are often overwhelmed and wondered why it is so difficult for women to tolerate one another. It seems that only women know. Ironically, the position of each of them is transient and continously evolves. A daughter-in-law today might be a mother-in-law as well or will become one someday in future. A sister-in-law today might be a daughter-in-law as well or become one someday in future. We can see how the positions change. What then is their problem?

While I commend the efforts of the women who stood up to challenge the national assembly members for the positions they took on some of the constitutional amendments that affect women, the struggle does not end there, even if the two chambers passed those amendments. For them to become laws, they must also be passed by the majority in the two third of the states in Nigeria. Can the women muster support to get them passed in 24 out of 36 states (19 from North and 17 from South), considering the cultural influence in the northern part of the country especially? Time will tell.

Also, whether that is achieved or not does not preclude women from galvanising themselves into a force to be reckoned with politically, as we approach 2023 general elections. I do not have the precise demography of registered voters based on gender but I know substantial number of women are registered. Women should present candidates for political offices among themselves, mobilise supports for them, morally, financially and otherwise. If they unite, such women will definitely win in many positions.

Truly, many men are ready to support women but Yorubas will say; "omo to ba s'ipa ni mama e n gbe" (heaven helps those who help themselves). Let this not be another "Not Too Young To Run", which became laws, only for the youths to continue to champion the cause of their ancestors; fathers, grandfathers and even great grandfathers, to lead them in political offices as we move towards 2023 still. Women should make statement with their political participations and votes!

Once again, I congratulate all wonderful women all over the world on the occasion of the 2022 International Women's Day. You are the real "G.O.A.T.S" (Greatest Of All Times).

May God continue to protect us and guide us aright. God Bless Nigeria.

Lateef Adewole can be reached via:

Email: [email protected]

Twitter: @lateef_adewole

Facebook: Lateef Adewole.